Why Can't I Live in California Where It's Warm?

I tried writing something here but my friend Ria read it and told me I'm the most awkward human being on the face of the planet. I accepted the compliment.

So my name's Mark and I'm a proud gay Californian who loves watching hockey. Weird I know. I go to school in Boston and miss In-n-Out.
Why Can't I Live in California Where It's Warm?